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  • The Tailgate: MNUFC Shutout Streak Snapped

    David Martin

    May 2, 2017
    The Angle
    The Tailgate: MNUFC Shutout Streak Snapped

    This week, we ask the fans: “Following a nightmare start to the season in which they allowed 18 goals in four games, Minnesota United posted four consecutive halves of shutout soccer, a streak which was broken this weekend by San Jose. What is your take on Minnesota’s much improved defense?”

     

    “Well over the last two games we’ve only allowed one goal, but we’ve also only scored one goal. We sign two Colorado defenders and we have become the Rapids.”

    Belinda Reger, Vacuum Cleaner

    ...

     “Sometimes all it takes is a simple fix, like replacing three out of four defenders, your defensive midfielder, your goalkeeper, and playing two of the worst offensive teams in the league.”

    Nicole Windwum, Adjunct Professor Emeritus

    ...

    “I tell you they may not look very good in the standings, but these Loons are winning a lot of hearts. Actually, it’s exactly like playing Hearts.”

    Ryder Svobodka, Easter Egg Hunter

     

    “I paid over $100 for tickets for myself, my husband, and my three kids, and spent half the game making potty runs and cleaning nacho cheese out of my eyelashes. It was a blast.”

    Dawn Franklin, Mother of Four
    .

    “It’s almost like we built a ‘Wonderwall’ around the goal and found an ‘Oasis’ in our desert of MLS results, and got a something something ‘Liam Gallagher’.”

    Brayden Lovecraft, McDonald’s Menu Chemist

     .

    What do YOU think? Tell us in the comments.


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    Colorado Rapids, Minnesota United FC, MLS, San Jose Earthquakes, Tailgage
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    5 responses to “The Tailgate: MNUFC Shutout Streak Snapped”

    1. Offensive Loons Fan Avatar
      Offensive Loons Fan
      May 3, 2017

      No one got my “mother of four” joke and it saddens me. Although maybe it wasn’t a great joke.

      Reply
      1. Wes Avatar
        Wes
        May 4, 2017

        … I still don’t get it.

        Reply
        1. Offensive Loons Fan Avatar
          Offensive Loons Fan
          May 4, 2017

          Just that she claimed to only have three kids but she has four. The idea of this horrible mother. Idk maybe it was a half formed thought.

          Reply
    2. Teresa Petersen Avatar
      Teresa Petersen
      May 3, 2017

      I got it; I thought you were counting the husband as one of the kids…

      Reply
    3. Scherbs Avatar
      Scherbs
      May 4, 2017

      Nicole Windwum for the win!

      Reply

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